Technologically Inept
by EphemeralSakura
Summary: SasuSaku - He returns home after his journey just to find out that his whole world has turned upside down. What the hell is a smart phone?


**A/N** : Okay... this is more of a dialogue kind of story that... a friend of mine helped me writing. It's a funny one to be read in a good afternoon... (or night, or morning, or dawn XD) I hope you enjoy!

 ** _Sasuke's P.O.V_**

It was winter morning when I arrived at Konoha after my journey of redemption. Everything was so different. The air, the mountains, the houses. There were so many lights and taller constructions around. Nothing held that same feeling of when I was about to leave after the war, let alone of when I was a child. Such fast changes made me think about for how long I was away. I didn't leave the village for too long, did I?

As I walked through the streets, I saw so many things that I didn't recognize. And those buildings behind the Hokage faces were all made in bizarre shape. Naruto probably gave the architect a little help with the projects... Idiot.

Ignoring all, I kept walking towards my new apartment. The one that Sakura picked for me after I decided to stay away from the Uchiha district for a while. It would be too lonely to return to a place with so many houses yet no one living inside. No one to wave you or even to say hello whenever you passed by. With the apartment, at least, the dimension of my loneliness wouldn't be that big and, since she and Naruto had their own keys, I doubted they would leave me alone at all. I wondered if she would be waiting for me at the apartment. She knew I would be back and, to be honest, having someone there to welcome me didn't seem to be a bad idea.

Finally, I arrived at the apartment. 705…706… 707. There was my room. I pulled out the key from my bag, the one with a tomato pin she gave me before I left to my journey. She told me it would be harder to lose as long as it was attached to a big, red and shining tomato.

 _ **-CLICK-**_

I pushed the door open. The sound echoed around and I felt a presence inside. I knew there was someone with the ability to mold chakra in there. I knew there were eyes looking at me and observing all my movements. But I didn't have to fear for I recognized that chakra after some seconds before she appeared on the door with a big smile on her face.

"Welcome home, Sasuke-kun!"

"Hn" I nodded my head.

"Come in, you must be tired. This is your apartment, come in, don't be shy." she pulled my still intact arm.

"I'm not shy" I growled slightly, earning a girly giggle from her.

"Sit here" She led me towards a big red sofa. The most comfortable sofa I've sat in months.

"Sasuke-kun, do you want a tea or coffee?" She asked, walking towards the kitchen. My kitchen.

I sighed, "Just water is fine".

I sat down on the red sofa, it felt nice for my sore butt. Too much walking made my whole body feel so tired and sore and none of the nights I had spent away were enough to fully recharge my energies.

"Here, Sasuke-kun." Sakura handed me a glass of water and grabbed a small black box on the table.

"Hn. What is that?" I stared at the box on her hands in curiousity.

"This" she raised the box in her hand. "This is a present for you. Open it" she placed the box on my lap, not letting that silly smile of hers fade.

"Present? For what?" I raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Nothing in particular. But this present will help you a lot" she smiled at me, nodding excitedly.

I opened the box to find a rectangular thing inside. Its color was black, and one side was made of glass. I took it out from the box, eyeing it in curiosity.

"What is it?"

"It's called IPhone 6, Sasuke kun. A smart phone."

"…."

She smiled from ear to ear "Do you like it?"

"Hn. Aa, IPhone 6. Hn. Good."

"Now we can do Skype when you are out on your journey again"

"Hn.…but Sakura..."

"Yes, Sasuke kun?"

"…What should I do with this thing…?" I asked her with a blank expression on my face. I really didn't know what that thing was. What was the function of that thing? Was it a bomb? If so, I could use it when I was attacked on my journey. But I didn't need a bomb, and this bomb was too big to be carried.

"….Sasuke kun.…You really don't know what an IPhone is?" She stared at me with wide eyes.

"Hn. Is this a new bomb?" I asked her innocently.

"What? A bomb?…..seriously, Sasuke-kun...a bomb?" She laughed so hard.

"Tch. Stop laughing" I scowled. "This is not funny, Sakura."

"And this is not a bomb either, Sasuke-kun! This is a phone. P-H-O-N-E to call or text someone."

"I have my own bird messenger for that, I don't need it"

"No. Your bird takes years to send a message. This Iphone is way faster. We can even Skype."

"…What the hell is Skype?"

Her eyes looked at me as if I was the most clueless person in the world. So what if I didn't know what Skype was? I don't need a phone to know something about the sky. It's blue in the morning and dark at night. I would never need a phone to know that.

" hn. I don't care."

" Tch... Where have you been all this time that you've never heard about it?" She chuckled. " if I had gone with you, I wouldn't have got so many followers."

" followers? Is there anyone following you? Is it more than one? Have they done anything to you?"

My eyes aimed the windows instantly and my hand reached for my sword. If someone was really following her around, then it meant she was in danger. And I couldn't let it happen. I didn't really know why but the idea of Sakura getting in trouble didn't make me happy at all. But, even if my concern was expressed in every inch of my body, the annoying girl had my so called IPhone on her hands. Her eyes not leaving the screen at all while a mischievous smirk played in her lips. I wonder with whom she has learned to do it. It's so annoying. Probably she's spending too much time with Naruto.

Once the screen changed its color from white to pink, she turned it to show me. On the top right, there was a weird picture of her inside a circular space. She had her green eyes half opened and her chin was resting on the space between her index and her thumb. Her lips twitched to the side and the Yin seal decorating her forehead. The fur of her winter coach contrasting her pink locks framing the picture. It was a quite... Interesting pic to be seen of her. A lot different from the one of the team 7. Sakura seemed more mature. A real woman, to be honest. I could never imagine that weak girl becoming a woman like the one who was standing in front of me. Things surely change in a blink of an eye when you're not home.

Under her own pic, which, by my point of view, seemed to be the main one; there were some basic information about her. Age, birthday, ninja rank and relationship status. It was written "crushing" and so I figured she was probably getting rid of many idiots with her own hands. It made perfect sense since Sakura never really had the patience to for any guy except... Hn.

On the lowest part of the screen, there were also three other pics in squared frames. In one of them she was with Naruto in an extremely awkward pose involving their tongues. The other one was with Ino, the Hyuuga girl and the other one from Neji's former team. They were all dressed for some kind of commemoration and I surely noticed what Sakura was wearing. It was too short for my taste. Tch... The last one was one of her, Naruto- again-, Kakashi, the guy who controls wood and my replacement. Never in my life I would have imagined a man as serious as Kakashi exposing himself like that. It was a shame to the whole team of jounins of the Leaf. Still, his ridiculous pose didn't matter at that time. Seeing those pics made me feel some things I wouldn't have never thought it would. But, what pissed me the most was the fact that I wasn't in any of the pics. I, Sasuke Uchiha, her team mate and close friend was not a part of what seemed to be her personal records. Even Sai was there, for god's sake. Maybe they had won the privilege of having their pic on... _sakuracherryblossom or whatever that place was named. Hn. It didn't matter.

Next to her pic, the so important information. Followers: 6,3K. Almost 7 thousand people trying to get her. I thought I was finally understanding that whole phone thing. It worked as a tracking device, after all. Since it had the numbers and the names of all her enemies, it would be just a matter of time before we could end that problem. In fact, I would be more than happy to do it myself, but, when I smirked in my own thoughts, her voice brought me back to the world. A world completely dominated by those smart phones.

" silly... My followers are like my admirers... Like... your fangirls, for example."

" hn. So are they as annoying as those girls? No wonder why you're crushing them."

" uh? Crushing..,." She blushed. Of course she did. Probably ashamed for not having finished all of her enemies. Silly Sakura. I couldn't blame her for being so slow.

" hn. Don't worry, I won't let them hurt you."

" Sasuke-kun..."

" give me some days and you'll have 0 followers."

She laughed again. I could see the happiness in her face and how much she was thankful for my help. Maybe I would even get rewarded after that. I would be a hero, after all... Hn, yes. Sasuke the hero. Sounds a lot better than Sasuke the traitor. It would be really good for my reputation. Perhaps I could even become Hokage after that.

" hn. Then... Before you crush all my followers, let's take a selfie. I wanna be the first to have the opportunity."

" sel- what?"

" a selfie... Tch."

She touched the screen twice making an image show up on that small device. It took me some time to finally identify that it was Sakura's skirt. Her dark green skirt a little lifted and exposing a bit of the skin of her tights as she approached me and sat by my side. How come was she going to give me something that showed that part of her body? Was she insane? I showed no reaction at such image until, in what seemed to be magic, it disappeared to give place to an image of our faces when she lifted the phone up. What the hell was happening inside that box? Another one of the news she was talking about? I didn't know but I had a bad feeling about that. Still, I let her continue as she snuggled closer to me. Her shoulders touching mine and our faces close enough for me to smell her perfume. Sakura smelled like vanilla. A sweet fragrance of vanilla. I liked it.

" just make a pout and I'll do the rest."

" a-a pout?"

" yeah... With your lips."

" a-are you sure?"

" of course. Come on, like me."

And so, she pouted. Her lips lifted up as she waited for my response. I couldn't really believe in what was happening. I mean, I knew Sakura did have some sort of romantic feelings towards me and that we had a past and all but... Asking for a kiss out of nothing was surely a direct request. Itachi had once told me that, before kissing, the boy and the girl have to pout so their lips can meet in a softer way. His explanation totally made sense on the night I left her, so, why wouldn't it after some years, right?

As her face slowly turned a little towards mine, I finally gave in. It was Sakura, after all. Doing such thing with her wouldn't be that weird. I pouted back, fixing my position so I could face her and, in a second, my lips were over hers.

 _ **-SNAP-**_

It was a quick kiss but I could feel her cheeks getting hot. She couldn't help blushing madly even if she had probably programmed such thing when she decided to give me the phone. I guess that was what she wanted for the phone. Silly girl... I would have done it if she had simply asked me to. Her lips were soft as expected. So soft that, after we separated, it didn't even seem that they had touched mine. That sensation had been so ephemera that it could be easily compared to a dream. But, at last, the phone showed a helpful utility. The screen had captured the moment of the kiss and the image had turned out pretty good. Her eyes were opened in surprise as the whole thing happened. I guess our selfi- or whatever it was- turned out perfectly fine.

" c-can I post it?"

" what?"

 _ **The End**_


End file.
